The real me revised

I am so angry inside
hiding negative emotions deep down
feelings of jealousy and rage
which engulf my insides like a disease
spreading throughout my body to force me
to hate everyone, bitch moan and complain

but i am strong
strong when i fight
which comes from deep down inside
when my blooding is pumping
when my adrenaline is rushing
i don't stop until i see
a beautiful red trickling from any part of their body
it's just something i cannot help

fear is something i barely know
except when it comes to death
i hate the thought of it
and it eats away at my brain

i love anything sexual
but i am not a whore
i respect myself
but i have low self esteem
it's something i desire

sometimes i hate to feel the way i do
i hate myself for being this way
but it's something i cannot change
it's something i will have to live with for the rest of my life
this is the real, deep, dark, me.

this is probably really bad. i just can't write poetry all too much though. bleh.